I feel shit. crying over some girl that isnt even trying wait never ever have tried to love me as much as I love u. I have to, I have to get over u. I'll still keep the promise but its up to u, if u love as ur friend, u would want me to be happy. still, I will always love u.

Currently listening to: Jonny Craig - I still feel her III

I just want to have a nice day just with u, we'll go somewhere, we'll take a cab together. I'll treat u pizzas, then we go to a nice cafe just chillin, talking abt stuffs, then we go to a park til night where we see the stars shines bright together, we'll hold hands and smile when we look at each other. I'll walk u home and meet ur parents. I kiss ur forehead and U'll kiss mine. late night calls just to say that I miss u so. just to say u love me so. I guess little things like that is hard for a guy like me to find, better luck next time maybe. to the future!!

Every night, even when I'm dead tired. I'll always think of u guys, I dont know why, but thats what I do every night.I admit, I cried abt u guys. I'm not that strong, but still. I believe that hope and faith will get me thru a better life. well praying also. well I know He's got a bigger plan for all of us, for me. I'll just go with the flow then.

I feel used. fuck this shit man. I thought everything would get better, well it is better, but not enough. if I'd only knew u were someone's, I will not give a single fuck. I will, but its equal. well now, it all crashes down. motherfucker. I should have known better. I'm just here to accompany u while he;s not home, and when he's home. I am absolutely, nothing.

I dont think it'll last, seriously I dont and I'm sad abt this fucking shit. well it always happen to me and its like, I'm cool~
I really felt that u felt too. I think I move to fucking fast, shit

I think I'm into u u know, I dont know if u feel the same way but the way u stare, u texts me, the way u told me everything, I dont know I feel something. I hope u feel it too. I know its too early, we'll get to know each other better before it turns serious, maybe this is just what I feel, I know u are someone else's but still,

Done

I think I've found her but I havent found a way to her yet

Are u worth my time?

I'll leave all these memories behind from the times we never shared

I've seen that dude on TV

I miss this site, I miss where I can spit it all fucking out without anyone giving shits abt it nor read it. I miss everything, I miss the year 1994 - 2001. But the clock wont stop ticking. I am not that good of a person, I rarely pray, I curse a lot, I dont give shits abt little things. but I believe that, even if u're a fucking fuck dip shit person. u still have heart. thats all matter. I miss my dad, I miss my mum, I miss my brother, I miss the time where we'd go to anywhere that I want, we would having so much fun. but things changed, I never blamed u dad for the divorce but, I'm just sad that it happened. I never had a real 'family' so to say, I want to feel what its like to just come back home and see ur parents in front of u. I want that feeling. I'm just, pathetic. I need friends, girlfriend sheesh that can wait I guess, I need TRUE FUCKING FRIENDS that will stand by me, no matter what. well some might say that 'dude ur high school friends wont last, when u work u'll have new friends' well fuck that. they will never be the same as my retarded high school mates!! i love u guys u know that, I just dont know how to show it. but I know there is hope, there is always hope. God is our hope, Allah. how I'm sad that I'm far away from You. I used to do what You asked, I prayed before, I'm sad that I've changed to a fucking loser. thats it. I will make this a promise, I will try to start pray again, and leave all the dirty things. insyaAllah. God help me. God bless us. Peace.

I cant do this anymore. this need to stop. I need to stop.

U know that already

I look like I dont fucking care, but I care. and if you fuckers tryna do somethin' that I dislike, I'm gonna rip your fucking face off like a wolverine. so true.. so fucking true... so I'm not gonna update this blog like I used to, but I'm still gonna update it. stay tuned!! ;p well there's not much to say actually. so till then, stay sic!! lol gay song zzzz

Currently listening to: Blessthefall - Guys like you make us look bad

Apa kaaaaau

Bila fikir2 balik. Kelakar jugak. Aku belum 16 dah nak berlagak bercinta konon. Sedar wei, skola belum habis. Haha. Aku tak cakap pun orang lain yang tengah bercinta kat luar tu salah. Cuma pada persepsi aku, aku tak perlukan benda tu lagi, kot... So.... Aku nak kau keluar daripada kepala aku, buka daripada hidup, tapi kepala jer. Sebab tak tahan la nak pikir benda2 yang tak perlu, kau bukan kisah sangat, maksud aku, kau kisah tapi bukan macam aku kisah. Biarkan hati aku kosong dulu, maybe satu hari nanti ada orang yang akan penuhkannye, geli gak aku ni kah3. Takpe la tu jer aku nak ckp, benda takde sape baca pun hahaha. God bless you. Peace

Currently listening to: Rosaline - Repeat after me

Bila tiba hari rayaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Aku tau aku ni mmg teruk, kuat mencarut, apa pun tak bole buat. Tapi aku nak ckp la, aku mmg sayang kawan2 aku. Aku sayang family aku, Agama aku. Aku tau maybe ada salah yg aku tak perasan aku terbuat kat korang, aku manusia. Maybe korang pun mcm tu. Apa pun aku tak pernah simpan dendam kat org. Aku pun tak brape kisah sgt bila Raya tiba. Aku bukan ada Kampung, family pun tak full set haha. Tpi aku bersyukur, at least aku bole sambut, aku ada jugak bju baru, ada kawan, ada keluarga, ada ibu dan ayah. Compared too other people yg susah. Aku bersyukur. Nway aku tak pandai nak berkata2. Aku nak ucap Selamat Hari Raya Maaf Zahir dan Batin. May Allah bless us with His grace on Syawal. I love you guys :)

I dont believe shits that people throw at me. Even friends.

Currently listening to: Boxcar Racer - Sorrow

:O

Just wanted to say.....


HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY MALAYSIA!!

God you're now 53 years of freedom ay :')
I'm proud to be a Malaysian. So must you.

Currently listening to: August Burns Red - The Escape Artist

Dude, isnt that you

So trust me when I say if a guy is treating you like he doesn't give a shit, he genuinely doesn't give a shit. No exceptions.

Currently listening to: Mayday Parade - Save Your Heart

I once ruled the toilet

Some of you fucking people disgusts me, never in my life knew you exist, even you friends. If you dont want to befriend with a weird, crack head, fat lips loser like me. Then please, walk away before I say hi to you ok. Or just, un-exist yourself. Keeehhh~ Fuck some of your opinions. I dont ever need some of you people in my life, have lived alone so I'll survive the heat. God damn you all. Peace.

I'll rage whenever I want to, fuck them and fuck you too.

Currently listening to: Your Demise - Ignorance Never Dies

That fly just waved at me

I dont need money, I dont need fancy clothes, I dont need a big house and all those fancy stuffs, I just need good family and friends that accompany me. I lost to much but no one seems to notice that. Well thats good cos I dont want to fuck up people's lives just for my stupid problems. I know how to keep my secrets safe. Always doing that. Well thats life. We just need God's help. So God bless us. Peace.

Currently listening to: Boxcar Racer - Letters to God

Birds got dick ya know

It's like, I'm more matured now I mean in my way of thinking of cos not like the mustache, acne, etc etc lol. So yeah. Improvising is the best solution when you're like, got no option. 2010 is abt to end, soon. Time sure flies man. Next year is my last year of schooling. But I have plans after school, I'm not just a loser that jokes around abt life, I've got ambitions. So gotta be a lil optimistic in things. That's me!! God bless you. Peace. Got nothing to blog abt actulaly but wtheck.

Currently listening to: Miss May I - Creations

I am no man I am a dude

Live my life own my own, selfish I know. But who would even know? If I could change myself I would be a better man, but I just hang on to the boy inside. Times have changed and I’ve changed perception, but I still remember… alone, alone so alone

Currently listening to: Miss May I - Our Kings

Waiting here still

Do you care? Do you actually care for everything that I said, or do to you? It's ok for not so care abt those stuffs, don't matter actually.. Not like I'm special or wtv to you lol. Well the truth is, moving on is not so easy when there's no one around to help you with it, friends are not the same anymore, so does family. Well no one does and so am I. But that's just life cycle, we evolve everyday. Right? But I'm cool with it, maybe. So just gotta keep praying to God for the better. Everything that He do is absolutely perfect and I believe something good will come out of it, a lil optimistic I must say, well that's just me and we have to love this life no matter what. I'm just sad and lonely but I know some people care abt me. I hope so. So yeah God bless you. Peace.

Currently listening to: Texas In July - I Am Yours

So what if you got a laser gun

It seems like people(s) are ignoring me, or maybe thats just my feeling? Oh well what can I do abt it rite. So Ramadhan has arrived! I am so loving this month, although there's more stuffs to do I feel like nothing is bothering me, I'm changing I guess and I like it that way =) So yeah what IF some of my friends are ignoring me now, I still got family, that will always be there for me. We'll see, the future is still ahead. God bless you. Happy fasting to all Muslims and may Allah bless us with His grace. Peace. Assalamualaikum.

Currently listening to: Mayday Parade - I Swear This Time I Mean It

Sosial Sosial

WAS AWESOME

the Prom Queen is a Nobody without an Automatic Peacock

Last nite was awesome!!! First I went to the school carnival at morning with lil bro and Dylan, after shitting all the crap out at the carnival, my mum picked us up and send us home. After that we all relaxed and heading straight to Sunway Shopping Mall. Banyak errggmmm kot!!! hahahaha, met Farra, and my buds, we were lepak-ing for a short while, then me, Dylan and lil bro went inside the Laggon for the World Stage, terbaik kot Katy Perry ngan Tokio Hotel!!! After all that commotion we met Azfiq, he needed a ride home. Went to KFC and lepak again, around 2:30AM like that my mum picked us up. Terbaik la semalam!!! So till then. God bless you. Peace. :D

Currently listening to: All-American Rejects - Gives You Hell

The Future Depends On Us

Today was fun~ Went to Times Square with my best bud, Dylan. And then we went to Pavi, then KLCC for lunch. Nice awek kat TS bole tahan!! hahaha. I bought Vans Era, nice cant wait to wear them at World Stage :P haha. So then we went home, tukar bju and then watched The Sorcerer's Apprentice at Galaxy Ampang. What a day! Banyak errggmm pulak tu haha!! Till then. God bless you. Peace.

Currently listening to: Dream Theater - Honor Thy Father

P/S: Actually, I dont have the mood to blog so yeah wtv~

Baik ni, tunggu duit jer.

Blummm

I'm so lost and confused. I'm trying to go to the rite path, seriously I'm trying to change. Don't matter how smart you are if you're lazy like a pension dog. SO. I need someone that can change me to the better you know. Friends and family helps but.. It's not the same if you HAVE that special someone. I never had one, hehehehe lame. So maybe someday I will! And fyi my dad will be back in KL today wohoo! I miss him so much but I can't tell him, err malu. Maybe I can pau him 1 or 2 tees hehe >:) well that's all for now. I hope one of you readers are the one for me :) (lame again) God bless you. Peace.

Currently listening to: Set Your Goals - Look Closer

Skidz From Hell

So yesterday was fun I guess. Woke up at 10am and at 11 something me, lil bro and mum went to Wangsa Walk Mall and watched Eclipse, -.- ehe. After that My mum decided she want to send me to my drumming class, but I said I want to go to the Cheer Comp '10 at BJ. She was like, 'okay let me drive you there' I was like, 'wow, really? cool' Aha arrived there, met Dylan, Faiq, Farah Dee and err Fahmy. So borak2 bla bla bla masuk dalam, pegi sana sini met Fizah I guess, heh heh poop tut woi woah habis! Went to KLCC after that, me Faiq and Dylan was like retards you know. Fun day, fun day. And thanks mum for 'grounding' me. Ehe love you :)

Currently listening to: Attack Attack! - Renob, Nevada

I'll make you proud

I just love this day, my mum just told me that I was a failure, she will not trust me anymore, good speech mum, I'm too pampered. Yeah that is SO true. Yeah korang cakap macam slalu ada je bila aku perlukan korang, yeah I just realized. I'm thinking about you guys more than myself. Bila aku nak korang besides aku utk guide aku belajar, mana? busy oh yeah lupa. Bila result kluar korang tak sabar nak tgk, bila teruk mcm ni la jawabnye. And yes mum whatcha say oh yes, "I always thought you were better than your brother" guess you're wrong mum. I was never better than him, you guys were never there for me how can you say I'm a failure, I never needed anything than the both of you besides me. Mum, you were always supporting me on what I want to do with my life, but now? I guess you are the same as dad. You dont care what I'll become. I want to change for the better, you guys just doesnt see and believe in me. It's okay, I will change for what is best for me, not you guys. Still, I love you guys. God bless you. Peace.

Currently listening to: Boxcar Racer - I Feel So

I saw something weird in the mirror

Knowing you was the most painful and happiest feeling I have ever experienced. But now, it's just a sad memory for me. You don't know who I am anymore, you will not treat me the same way anymore. I feel the same way too. But it's just sad to know that you actually never loved me, like I love you. Well maybe the word 'love' will not describe of definite the way I cared and love you, wait.. I still care about you, and that 'love' feeling should fade a way forever, I can't change the taste of an apple to the taste of a banana, or orange or whatever. You crushed my heart, and then you crush it again. That's cool btw. Well I hope I'm suffering TML which means Temporary Memory Lost. Is there such a thing. Well don't matter though I'm just an ordinary dude to you, nothing special, so guess I have to move forward. God bless you. Peace.


Currently listening to: Asking Alexandria - I Used To Have A Best Friend (But Then He Gave Me An STD)

We got cakes

Woah, so as you all know, I'm having a lot of pressure over the past few weeks. I'm having problem with school, friends, family and MYSELF. So I'm trying to fix all of those fucking things alone I guess. But it's cool I guess. Nobody's perfect rite :) Aha so I'll try my best to solve those things. I'm gonna try to pray back cos it's my responsibility as a muslim. So yeah. And also I need to FUCKING study for God's sake! My marks are very low man, kata nak berjaya la apa jadah so kau kena la belajar ish Ammar ni -.- So yeah. That's basically what I'm feeling rite now. God bless you. Peace.

Currently listening to: Attack Attack! - What Happens If I Can't Check My Myspace When We Get There?

Uih!

Great combination! Harap harap aku dpt ni one day, hmm

Weatherman

Okay! Today's Saturday, like ALWAYS. Duduk rumah online!!! Kimak bosan gak hari hari macam ni, heh~ So I planned to go out or something but it looks like everyone is busy or something, I don't know. Haha. So I was just thinking, WHAT TO DO WITH MY LIFE ashxkjsdwedyiasowd. I have dreams, goals. So what I have to do is just study smart, and look forward. And yes my feelings for her is starting to fade. Sorry it's not that I forgot about you or something, it's better that way, you won't get hurt neither do I. =) Maybe you'll find someone better, like you've always wanted. Haha. So will update later. God bless you. Peace.

Currently listening to: A Skylit Drive - Those Cannons Could Sink A Ship

Unlike you, we drink our food

Wazzzuupppp. Watched Toy Story 3 at Wangsa Walk with mum and lil bro, God that movie touched me. I kinda cried haha =D but that's good rite, that shows my other side hehe. Well now its Saturday, what to do. hmmm i mean later, now it's only 12.32am hahaha. Maybe hanging out or something, well we'll see. Later. God bless you. Peace.

Currently listening to: This Or The Apocalypse - Hayseed

Wohoo That's Fun

WTF! It's Friday, I didn't go to school for some reasons. Woke the fucking up at what?! 2pm yeah cool. Missed my Jumaat prayer =.= and yes. I'm still not bathing, ahahah. I just noticed that my english is getting worse, hmm. So like always, I will sit in front of the laptop, and online *_* Gonna go watch Toy Story 3 tonite wehee :D will update later. God bless you. Peace

Currently listening to: Of Mice & Men - John Deux Trois

d00d

Hello world! Supp? hehe. Actually, there's a lot of things that keep messing with my head, gosh it feels, weird i guess. I've just decided what I want to do for a living, I want to open my own clothing line, and yes that's my dream job. And a part time musician and also working at my dad's company. Hope my dreams and goals will be achieve smoothly. God help me. God bless you. Peace :)

Currently listening to; Nickelback - Never gonna be alone

Empty

I have never had a girlfriend since like, ever. I know, I'm lame. But still, I think it was cool back then you know. And I know who wants a dude like me, heh I've got nothing. But now the loneliness is getting stronger, my life is getting complicated and hard. I need someone who will always be there for me. I'm not looking for the perfect person, just the rite one. So guess I'll have to wait. To find my whoever, wherever she may be. Peace.

Currently listening to: Dream Theater - Wither

Heh

Hmm, today's Wednesday, as usual school. But I just got back from school haha. So basically, I just realize that the people I care the most seems to treat me like shit, I don't know what the hell I do to them to deserve this, but I'm not born to please everyone rite. I just have to ignore this shit and just live. God help me. God bless you. Will update later, peace.

Currently listening to: + 44 - Weatherman

People do sports

Sorry, I don't know what to put to the title haha. So I think I'm gonna update this shit everyday I guess? Cos my addiction of blogging has return~ Hoorah!! So yeah. See you soon! I know I don't have many followers but hey? Haha? Peace.

Currently listening to: Circa Survive - Spirit of The Stairwell

Like shit, you abandoned me

Weyh, sombong, weyh kau okay ke tak? haa? tak? eh pehal aku plak kena? laah~ suka hati kau la,

tett teet teet teett teet tteet. Oh yes there it is,

..... was successfully removed from your friend list.

Cool shit rite, yeah cool shit

Currently listening to: Emarosa - Just Another Marionette

Its. All. Over. Now.

I love you, you don't? well that's cool. I lied about having a girlfriend and what the fuck? You're mad at me because of that? You said you care. Well it doesn't look like you care. I know you care. But still, I will always love you. Yes you. What? still don't love me? cool. Yeah.

Currently listening to: Superman Is Dead - Kuat kita bersinar

Far Away

It's been almost 2 month I guess since I've updated this blog, well I'm kinda using tumblr now cos it's easy and more fun :D but I won't forget this blog ahahah. So new semester. School kinda sucks cos it's the same. But I want to be a successful dude to my parents and country :D I'm missing my dad, it's been a month since i last saw him, gonna go meet him this 23 - 25/7 at Sabah with my lil bro. So meanwhile. Peace

Currently listening to: Paramore - Careful

I need you...

pekena tomyam sedap nii, perggh lama gak tak makan tomyam!!

I'm a Zebra with Tiger stripes

Actually I have nothing to err type? blog about but yeah, here I am, here we go life's waiting to begin. Angels & Airwaves is an awesome band, LOVE the new album, hmm oh yes! tadi ponteng, waste of time baik pegi skola, mggu depan exam if I'm not mistaken, hmm sucks but nanti cuti seminggu yayy! Jumaat kinda sucks, but dah berlaku so yeah, I pray for your happiness daddy :) and yes! I miss you la :/ but, maybe you're not missing me, who am I right? so here I am, waiting.

Always

Do you feel light shine in the darkest of nights,
Or does the pain stack up from the skin to the core,
Do you find everytime that you cover your eyes to keep the tears held up,
Dripping down even more,
Let the words come down,
Every line in sight and put the young flames up and make you cower and,
Cower If the sun breaks in instead of sparkin the sight,
I promise you I’ll be here to let the light in.

Nothing seems to matter now

Down. That's it.

Murdering clothes, It whispers

Esok saya baju saya sampai tak sabarnya :D

Battle Of The Gods

We watched this

I want this

I breath revenge tonight

Dude it's almost 12, i am like fuckin' sleepy, but yeah lets do this shit! i'm your homeboy bitch! i'm gonna fuck you like a dog in a bin, and then i'm gonna cum it at your fuckin' face! dude! what am i trucking about?! gosh mengucap la haha. so yeah... (still thinking) yeah.. went hanging out with Awe, we like go to the bank and shit, we like to partayyy! yeaaah! gimme some love dipshit ah yeah baby that's more like it, jyeah! he's wearing a Trivium t'shirt duhh and i'm like wearing a A Day To Remember t'shirt(ciplak punya) and imma sing you one song, ....

I'll be waiting here for you

Tak sabau nak dapat ni, hehehe ^^

I Feel Like I Have Buried Myself Alive,

urrggh I'm sick, :(

Incinerated By A Glass Of Water

semalam aku berak bapak best sial! nikmatnya macam gambar kat atas!

Wobbly Dudes

I hope i get one of those, eh sorry I will get one of those Muahahaha! >:D

Infected!

I'm currently addicted to zombies thanks to Dylan :) dude I've always wish zombies are real, but if they are real then we wouldn't be eating, sleeping, pooping or trucking all the time, i will not even blogging about this shit, we would all stay up just to fight those sons of bitches!

Lets Get This Partayy Started!

Today is the first time aku ponteng skola! haha! that's all I want to say to you assfucking morons! goodnight! :)

I Want These! Please :(

Shine Drumkit

Joey Jordison's Snare

DW5000 Double Pedals

When will I get these things?! I want them now! :(

I Want To Meet These Guys!

Joey Jordison

Mike Portnoy

Chris Adler

Travis Barker

Ni suma impian aku je, taktau la tercapai ke tak -_-

Hey! you are ruining everything,

I love you but you still don't know what i feel! everything i do is wrong! I don't deserve this but it's up to you! it's up to you! someday i will tell you! and you will regret what you've done! sori! I love you!

Past, Present, Future?

2010, i didn't expect 2009 to end man, my life gets harder, my studies get further, i'm bored, missing everyone, this heart feel like it's gonna explode, i don't need girlfriends or what, i just need my friends and family back. hope it will end soon, pray for it. the past is only the future with the lights on. so i gotta move on.